I was going to do this whole post yesterday where I would say:

My dog does this exact thing when we have a breath-holding contest!

And then post that video clip from Friends where Joey is holding his breath and Phoebe says, “Joey’s been holding his breath for almost four minutes!”

Then Chandler plugs Joey’s nose. Joey sucks in breath through his mouth and says, “ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!?”

Then… My dog does this exact thing when we have a breath-holding contest!

***

Do you know the one? It would have been funny, right?

But I couldn’t find the clip online. I went down a bit of a YouTube wormhole looking for it. But I had a lot of things on my to-do list. So eventually I had to quit.

You know the day after you get back from a lovely but tiring trip and you have two appointments back-to-back in the morning and there’s a lot of construction so you’re late for the first one and then you go to the wrong doctor’s office for the second one and by the time you drag yourself back home at lunchtime you feel like you’ve been punched in the brain and there are people painting so the whole house smells like paint and you haven’t unpacked and you need to go to the drugstore but there’s not a chance in hell of that happening and people keep emailing you and you’re like damn these are lovely great emails and I cannot handle them right now but then someone emails and changes your appointment for the next day to Friday so all of a sudden you have a day of reprieve and you finally breathe and take the dog for a walk?

Anyway. Would it have been funny?

My dog totally does do that. It’s like she doesn’t understand the concept at all.